What is Handfasting?

What is Handfasting?

Handfasting is a beautiful and symbolic ritual that has been used for centuries to signify a couple’s commitment to one another. It’s thought that the ritual originates from ancient Celtic traditions.

Handfasting involves using ribbons or cords to bind the couple’s hands together representing their union, commitment to each other, and the strength of their bond. While historically it was used as a form of betrothal or a temporary marriage, today it is often included in wedding ceremonies as a meaningful and visual representation of love and commitment.

A little history: the word Handfasting comes from the old Norse word handfesta which means ‘strike a bargain by joining hands’. In the phrase ‘creating a binding contract’ the word “binding” comes from the Old English word bindan, meaning “to tie or fasten.” A handfasting visually reflects the idea that parties are metaphorically “tied” to their promises and to each other. Quite literally tying the knot.

How to Include a Handfasting in a Wedding

A handfasting ritual can be a stunning and personal addition to a wedding ceremony. It can be adapted to suit the couple’s values, beliefs, and preferences, making it a unique and meaningful moment. Typically, during a humanist ceremony, the celebrant will explain the meaning of handfasting before wrapping ribbons or cords around the couple’s hands while they say their vows or exchange promises. Some couples choose different coloured ribbons to symbolise various aspects of their relationship, such as love, loyalty, and unity. The binding can be tied into a knot, reinforcing the idea of “tying the knot.”

One of the wonderful aspects of handfasting is its flexibility. It can be woven seamlessly into a wedding ceremony, whether it is a small, intimate gathering or a larger celebration. It can also be performed alongside other meaningful traditions, such as ring warming or readings.

Every humanist wedding ceremony is unique, crafted by a Humanist Ceremonies celebrant to create a personal and authentic wedding day.

Sawyer and Sawyer Photography

Who Can Do a Handfasting ritual?

In a humanist wedding, a celebrant can perform a handfasting ritual as part of a non-religious ceremony. All Humanist Ceremonies celebrants are trained in conducting handfastings and can tailor the ritual to reflect the couple’s relationship and values. They can also guide couples on the significance of the tradition, helping them choose the right colours and words to make it suit them.

In addition to the celebrant, other members of the family or close friends can be involved in the handfasting. Parents, children, or wedding guests can take part by placing the ribbons around the couple’s hands, adding an extra layer of symbolism and connection. This inclusion can highlight the idea of love and support from family and friends.

Why Choose Handfasting for your wedding?

Handfasting is a deeply romantic and symbolic act with a long history, making it a perfect addition to a wedding ceremony. It provides a powerful visual representation of unity and lasting commitment while offering couples a chance to incorporate a meaningful tradition into their special day. Whether it’s a nod to history, a way to involve loved ones, or simply a beautiful ritual to mark the start of the rest of your lives together, handfasting is a timeless and heartfelt gesture that celebrates love.

If you’re considering including handfasting in your wedding, a Humanist Ceremonies celebrant will be able to talk with you about how best to weave handfasting into your wedding day. They will work with you to craft a ceremony that reflects your wishes, ensuring a truly unforgettable celebration.

Examples of Handfasting in Weddings

Handfasting has been beautifully incorporated into numerous humanist weddings, each uniquely reflecting the couple’s story and values. Here are some stories of a few humanist wedding ceremonies which included a handfasting ritual:

Tasha and Raef’s humanist wedding: A ceremony with equality at the heart

A same-sex marriage in Northern Ireland and a steampunk wedding in England: Rian and Owen’s humanist ceremony

We had a humanist wedding after 22 years together

Humanist weddings

Humanist weddings are meaningful non-religious ceremonies which are tailored to you.

You can read our full guide to including handfasting in a humanist wedding ceremony here.

Our highly trained celebrants will be able to talk with you about the different options for your wedding ceremony. Find a wedding celebrant here.

'My humanist ceremony was the most special day of my life. All my family were blown away. Both my parents said that they'd never been to a wedding that was more personal or heartfelt.'
Madeleine, 34

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