If you’re planning to get married, you may be wondering about the different types of ceremonies available. In the UK, couples who want a wedding led by someone other than a vicar, priest, rabbi, or other religious leader can choose between having a civil marriage led by a registrar, or a ceremony led by a humanist or independent celebrant. If you are not religious, and want the person who leads your wedding to share that non-religious view, a humanist celebrant could be the right option for you.
In Northern Ireland, Scotland and the Channel Islands, humanist marriages are legally recognised and so a Humanist Ceremonies or Humanist Society Scotland celebrant can complete all the legalities for you as part of your humanist wedding ceremony.
In England and Wales, however, where we are still campaigning for legal recognition of humanist marriages, if you choose a humanist wedding you’ll have to complete the legalities separately with the registrar. For some couples, it might feel like it’s not worth the effort to have two events: it seems cumbersome and unnecessary. Why bother to have both when you could just have a registrar marriage?
While both a humanist wedding and a registrar marriage provide a way to celebrate your commitment, there are significant differences, especially when it comes to making the ceremony unique, authentic, personal, and custom-made to you. Here we will take a closer look at the key differences and why a humanist wedding might be the choice that gives you the heartfelt and meaningful wedding you desire.
What is a Registrar Marriage?
A registrar marriage ceremony is a civil ceremony conducted by a government appointed registrar. These ceremonies must adhere to legal requirements and are typically held at a registry office or a licensed venue, such as an authorised hotel or country house. While some personalisation may be possible, there are restrictions on content, so, if you want to add some of your own vows, you’ll have to have them approved by the registrar first. Registrars conduct multiple weddings in a day so ceremony times and formats are usually standardised, making the experience somewhat formal and structured. You may find that the registrar does not have availability for your preferred date or time at your wedding venue, or at the registry office.
One important thing to note is that you are unlikely to meet your registrar before your wedding day, or have a say in who conducts your ceremony. You won’t be able to talk through any ideas for your ceremony in advance so there may be little opportunity to build a relationship with the person officiating your wedding. This can feel impersonal for some couples.
What makes a humanist wedding different to a registrar marriage?
A humanist wedding is a fully personalised, meaningful, non-religious ceremony that reflects your unique story and values. Here are some of the key benefits:
1. Your wedding can take place anywhere
Unlike a registrar-led wedding, which must take place in a register office or a licensed venue, a humanist ceremony can take place anywhere. Whether you dream of saying your vows on a beach, in a woodland, at home, or even at a favourite landmark, a humanist wedding allows you the freedom to choose a location that’s truly special to you.
2. Your wedding can take place at any time
With a humanist ceremony, you are not bound by office hours, or for your ceremony to be forced to fit in around the availability of the registrar. If you want to get married at day break, or under twinkling stars, it’s up to you!
3. A ceremony that’s entirely personal to you
One of the biggest advantages of a humanist wedding is that there are no set scripts or restrictions. Your celebrant will work with you, over many weeks and months, to create a ceremony that reflects your personalities and values, your journey, and your vision for the day. You can include your own vows, readings, music, and symbolic rituals like hand-fasting or sand blending that hold personal meaning.
4. Your celebrant works with you to create a bespoke script
Rather than following a generic format, a Humanist Ceremonies celebrant will meet with you to l take time to get to know you as a couple, and what’s important to you for your wedding ceremony. Based on your discussions together, they’ll craft a unique script that tells your love story, making the ceremony deeply personal and engaging. This ensures that your wedding feels warm, heartfelt, and truly about you.
5. You can choose your celebrant
Unlike a registrar-led wedding, where you have no control over who officiates your ceremony, with a humanist wedding, you can choose your celebrant. Humanist Ceremonies is a network of highly trained celebrants from all walks of life, working throughout England, Wales, Northern Ireland and the Channel Islands, You can search for a celebrant near you, and read their profiles at humanists.uk/ceremonies/find-a-celebrant/weddings/. This means that you can select someone to work with who suits your style, who understands your vision, and who will make you feel comfortable and at ease on your big day.
6. No strict time restrictions
There may be limited time for your ceremony, particularly in a busy registry office where multiple weddings are scheduled for the day. A humanist wedding, however, is conducted at your own pace, allowing you to fully enjoy your special moment without feeling rushed.
7. A humanist wedding is an authentic, non-religious ceremony
For couples who want a non-religious but heartfelt wedding, a humanist ceremony is an ideal choice. All Humanist Ceremonies celebrants share humanist values, ensuring that your ceremony is authentic and truly reflective of your beliefs. A humanist wedding celebrates love, commitment, equality, and shared values in a way that’s meaningful without religious content. This makes it a great option for couples from different backgrounds, or those who simply prefer a non-religious approach. Humanist ceremonies are welcoming and inclusive to all guests, regardless of their beliefs or faiths.
Legal recognition of humanist weddings in the UK
Humanist marriages are legally recognised in Northern Ireland, Scotland, Jersey, and Guernsey, so couples in these locations can have a humanist wedding as their sole legal ceremony. However, in England and Wales, humanist marriages are not yet legally binding, although we continue to campaign very hard. This means that couples who wish to have a humanist wedding in these regions also need to have a separate civil ceremony to complete the formalities.
Many couples in England and Wales choose to have a simple legal ceremony (sometimes called a ‘basic Registration of Marriage’ or‘ 2 + 2 ceremony’, which means the couple and two witnesses, usually in a small room) in advance and then celebrate their commitment fully with a personalised meaningful humanist wedding. This allows them to enjoy the best of both worlds fulfilling the legal requirements while also having a deeply personal and meaningful ceremony that authentically reflects their relationship
Working with a Humanist Ceremonies celebrant
Humanist Ceremonies is a network of highly trained professional celebrants. Every Humanist Ceremonies celebrant is accredited by Humanists UK and upholds humanist values, ensuring an inclusive, personal, and professional experience.
To find a Humanist Ceremonies celebrant for your wedding, you can visit the Find a celebrant map and search for accredited celebrants in your area. Your chosen celebrant will work closely with you to craft your perfect wedding ceremony.
Making the Right Choice for Your Wedding
Both registrar-led and humanist weddings offer different experiences, so the choice ultimately depends on what matters most to you. If you want a simple, legally binding marriage ceremony with minimal personalisation, a registrar-led wedding may suit your needs. However, if you’re looking for a wedding day that is completely tailored to you, can take place anywhere, and allows you to express your love in a truly personal way, a humanist wedding is a wonderful choice.
Your wedding day should be a reflection of your love and the life you’re building together. If you want a ceremony that’s as unique as your relationship, a humanist wedding might be just what you’re looking for!
