--- title: "‘They shouted at the demons inside me’: survivors of conversion practices tell Parliament ban can’t wait" date: "2026-11-02T17:59:20+00:00" modified: "2026-11-02T18:01:05+00:00" url: "https://humanists.uk/2026/11/02/they-shouted-at-the-demons-inside-me-survivors-of-conversion-practices-tell-parliament-ban-cant-wait/" post_id: 201743 categories: ["LGBT Humanists", "News"] --- # ‘They shouted at the demons inside me’: survivors of conversion practices tell Parliament ban can’t wait ![](https://i0.wp.com/humanists.uk/wp-content/uploads/Ian-Smith-Cropped.jpg?resize=720%2C405&ssl=1)Ian Smith, a man who went through exorcisms intended to rid him of being gay, gave evidence today to Parliament’s Joint Committee on the Draft Conversion Practices Bill. He described how a decade of attempts to change his sexuality left him suicidal, and how almost none of it would have been clearly against the law. Humanists UK is calling for a full and comprehensive ban on conversion practices. Ian gave evidence alongside Guernsey Deputy Jayne Ozanne OBE. Jayne experienced religious conversion therapy for over 20 years, including [exorcisms](https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c1ey3xxey58o) and hypnosis, leading to self-hatred and self-harm that left her hospitalised multiple times. She is the former Chair of the [Ban Conversion Therapy Coalition](https://www.banconversionpractices.com/). **She told the Committee:** > ‘Of people who are trying to… “pray the gay away”. Prayer goes to the heart of this, and I speak as a Christian. I speak as someone with a deep love of prayer, but not all prayer is healthy or good, and in my case, it caused me sadly, after 20 years of seeking out prayer, to end up in hospital fighting for my life because my body couldn’t take the strain. > Of the constant messaging that who I was was unacceptable and that I would never seek to have the intimacy that I craved. I think a lot of people focus on sex, it’s not. It’s about love. It’s about being able to form a family unit, being able to have a satisfying, fulfilled life full of dignity.’ ![](https://i0.wp.com/humanists.uk/wp-content/uploads/Guernsey-Deputy-Jayne-Ozanne-OBE.jpg?resize=768%2C432&ssl=1)Ian’s story ----------- Ian was 18 when he moved to Newport to study film, became a born-again Christian, and set out to stop being gay. From 1987 to 1997 he took part in conversion practices across a network of churches, counsellors, and support groups in Wales and Bristol. These included exorcisms. At one session, when he was 19 or 20, Ian told those present that he was attracted to men and asked for help. The women in the room were asked to leave. Around ten men gathered around him. > ‘They laid hands on me, spoke in tongues and shouted at the demons they believed were inside me. This went on for more than two hours. I remember being in a strange, disconnected state, writhing around on the floor as they continued to pray and shout.’ For months afterwards he would wake up screaming in the night, so loudly that his neighbours thought his landlady was being attacked. ![](https://i0.wp.com/humanists.uk/wp-content/uploads/Ian-Smith-Cropped-2.jpg?resize=720%2C405&ssl=1)‘My whole environment became conversion therapy’ ------------------------------------------------ The exorcisms were only part of it. Ian also saw Christian counsellors and went to peer-support groups that taught him that if he couldn’t change his sexuality, he must stay celibate and deny it. He was told his relationship with his father had made him gay, and that a better relationship with god could put it right. > ‘This wasn’t one person or one session. My whole environment became conversion therapy.’ When nothing worked, Ian was told the fault was his own. ‘The explanation was that I wasn’t close enough to god. I hadn’t prayed enough, trusted enough, or surrendered enough,’ he said. ‘No-one considered that the attempts to “cure” me might be causing the harm.’ A diary entry from those years reads: ‘The past is to be forgotten, the present tolerated and the future feared.’ Ian eventually attempted to take his own life and was admitted to a psychiatric unit. There, an on-duty psychiatrist told him: ‘There is nothing wrong with being gay.’ > ‘After years of prayer, exorcisms, therapy, and attempts to change, a single sentence offered something I had rarely been able to accept: perhaps I wasn’t the problem,’ Are conversion practices already illegal? ----------------------------------------- There is currently no law in England and Wales that bans conversion practices. Existing criminal law is built around physical violence, threats, and injury. Most of what Ian went through doesn’t fit it: prayer, counselling, and group sessions aimed at changing or suppressing his sexuality, which he sought out willingly and which caused serious psychological rather than physical harm. The harm came from years of practices that each looked lawful on their own. ### Ian told Humanists UK: > ‘I wasn’t simply having these practices imposed on me against my will. I actively sought them out because I believed they could help me become the person I thought I ought to be. My willingness to participate did not make them harmless.’ > ‘Beyond individual cases, a ban sends a clear message to institutions and society: attempting to change or suppress someone’s sexual orientation is unacceptable. Some individuals later apologised, but we cannot rely on people changing their minds or institutions acknowledging their failures. The law must set a clear standard to protect people.’ Conversion practices are still happening ---------------------------------------- Ian later trained as a counsellor. About six years ago, working at Cardiff University, he met young clients who were suicidal because they were gay and didn’t want to be. Ian now runs Helpu, a men’s mental health initiative in Wales that works to reduce male suicide. ### Nathan Stilwell, Head of Press and Campaign Communications, said: > ‘Ian was subjected to exorcisms because he was gay, and was brought to the brink of losing his life. Yet most of what he endured would still not clearly be illegal today. That is why this law matters. Freedom of religion or belief is vital, and people must remain free to pray and to seek open, exploratory support. But it has never meant freedom to harm. We urge Parliament to pass a ban that protects everyone, with no loopholes for suppression or so-called consent.’ #### Notes For further comment or information, media should contact Humanists UK Head of Press and Campaign Communications Nathan Stilwell at or phone 020 3675 0959 (media only). Do you have a story to share about conversion practices? Email . Learn more about the [Ban Conversion Therapy Coalition](https://www.banconversionpractices.com/). Read more about our work on [ending conversion practices](https://humanists.uk/campaigns/policy-unit/banning-conversion-practices/). Learn about [Faith to Faithless](https://www.faithtofaithless.com/) – our support network for people leaving high-control religions. If you have been affected by any of the issues in this story, you can contact Samaritans free, day or night, on 116 123 or at [samaritans.org](https://www.samaritans.org/). Humanists UK is the national charity working on behalf of non-religious people. 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